If you are gay it‘s almost impossible after the last couple of weeks to work out what the world wants, expects or thinks of you now. Your head will be spinning faster than the revolving door on Michael Barrymore’s closet. In Government it looks like you could possibly remain Secretary of State for Wales, but by implication from the press coverage, only as long as you have sex indoors and with men you have met before. To be married and gay is officially now “a personal tragedy”, transformed into hypocrisy if anyone finds out about it, and something “sick and illegal” if you act on it on impulse anywhere near shrubbery. According to Lurch from the Addams Family’s stunt double, Norman Tebbit, you should be barred from being Home Secretary if you’re gay, as he suggested in a letter to The Telegraph. The Daily Mail profiled Chris Smith and his partner and pronounced them the acceptable face of homosexuality. So do you really have to be Culture Minister or, pace the BBC for daring to discuss his private life, might you be fine as Secretary of State for Trade & Industry because even though you are gay, it’s OK by The Sun because you have a “brilliant mind” and are a “talented politician”? As ever advice on the right way to be homosexual has been pouring from journalists, politicians and other people only rendered charismatic by publication in such a confusing torrent that the love that dares not speak it’s name can now hardly work out what to say when it opens its mouth. Should it stay in the closet and not flaunt itself; flaunt itself but only if it’s polite, partnered and preferably has a pet; shut up about itself altogether and then be accused of being hypocritical when other people find out? Risk open affection in public only to be told by Telegraph columnists in what they think is a bracing and expression of an opinion too inhibited of late that you are “distasteful” or worse that you “disgust them”? And if disgust is coming your way, should you be open about your desires in Wyoming and risk being beaten to death for pleasure like poor innocent, young Mathew Shepherd?
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The Gay State of the Nation
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